Does it have to be so hard?

I often hear quotes like “If you’re comfortable, you’re not growing” or “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone”.

So we’re led to believe that growth lies in discomfort - that we need to push harder, strive more, and leave our comfort zones in order to evolve.

For years, this became my mindset. I thought that if I wanted something badly enough, I had to set a goal, stay focused, tackle obstacles head-on, and stretch myself in all directions to make it happen.

But over time, I started wondering…does it have to be so hard?

What if growth isn’t just about pushing through resistance, but about recognising when that resistance is a quiet nudge - telling us we might be forcing something that doesn’t need to be forced?

There’s a beautiful line by Mark Nepo that captures this:

"The flower doesn’t dream of the bee. The flower blossoms and the bee comes."

I’ve found this to be true, again and again.

When I chase or grasp, I often feel further away. Striving makes everything feel tight and contracted - closing the space for new possibilities to enter.

When I let go of outcomes, when I stop trying so hard, things tend to arrive. Quietly and naturally. Without the strain.

I haven’t stopped showing up. I still act and I still care.

But I’ve noticed that doing things for an outcome can sometimes signal that where I am right now isn’t enough. And when that’s the underlying belief, it’s easy to feel like I’m constantly trying to escape the present, rather than living it.

There’s a difference between effort and force.

Sometimes, the most powerful shift I can make is to soften.
Take the blinkers off and stay open.

And let the right opportunities reveal themselves.

(𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘦 - 𝘰𝘪𝘭 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘺 𝘮𝘦: "𝘉𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘰𝘮 & 𝘉𝘦")